Pondering Faith

I am the Problem

I am the problem.

Whenever I make myself and my own feelings the only important part of a conversation or relationship, I am the problem. When I put my desires over the consideration of others, I am the problem. When I fail to see other people as regular human beings, I am the problem.

The only way to solve this problem is to put myself in my proper place. I need to realize that everyone has feelings, desires, and needs, and that those feelings might be different than mine. I must realize that everyone is human. I must see people and interact with people the way that Jesus did – with love. If I can treat people with God’s kind of love, every interaction I have will be different.

It’s amazing how much good we can do if we stop pointing fingers at others and point at ourselves first. I am the problem.

(For more on this topic, I recommend the book: Leadership and Self Deception, by the Arbinger Group)


Welcome to Pondering Faith! My name is Dan. I am a husband, father, and pastor. I serve as the Director of Church Development for the Western North Carolina Conference of the United Methodist Church. This is the place where I ponder all things related to faith, including church leadership, and life in general.